Saturday, November 17, 2007

Yard Sales

We had a yard sale yesterday and today. Yard sales bring out the crazy people. Most of the shoppers are normal but there are a few... well, that are just weird or plain old selfish.

One old lady, cantankerous woman, asked me what size clothes I wore then told me to try on a jacket for her cause she didn't want to take her coat off. When I got the jacket on she looked at me in it and let me know that it didn't close all the way because I'm obviously bigger than her. Stupid woman.

This same woman looked at one of Amber's expensive Madame Alexander dolls. She let me know that it was not a Madame Alexander. It was not in its original clothes and it was not in good shape. She said it was dirty too. I told her that's why it's priced at $40 and not $400. I think after all of that she spent about 45 cents. Stupid woman. Later, the doll sold to woman who collected dolls. She was thrilled at the deal.

One lady looked at a box... a box... of Monet 'Water Lilies' dishes marked at $20 and asked if I'd take $5. Are you smokin' crack? No, I will not take $5. "Now go away, cause I no like you no more!" (said w/ a Latin accent)

Then a guy comes up and wants to just buy 2 place settings out of the box. Umm... no. Nobody bought the dishes so I'm donating them to Women's Ministry to use at luncheons.

Another lady spent $9 on clothes and then shoplifted a 25 cent jump rope. I would have given it to her if she'd asked. And it was not a mistake, I watched her bury the jump rope in one of the bags.

One man used the 's' word twice in a 2 minute conversation and then told me "God bless you" as he was leaving. I found that a tad inconsistent.

Another man drove up in his car that was decorated with 4 Auburn flags, an Auburn tag on the front and some kind of Auburn thing dangling from the rear view mirror. He had on an Auburn hat, and Auburn shirt, Auburn shoelaces and a gold Auburn necklace. So, quite humorously, I asked "You an Auburn fan?" He looked right at me and very seriously answered "Yes ma'am." Totally missed the joke. Completely. I felt kinda sorry for him. Maybe he'll find a good deal on a sense of humor one day.

I abhor getting ready for a yard sale but I like the actual selling part. You meet nice people and not so nice people. You get to help people sometimes. It was good. And I made almost $100! Ain't nothin' wrong with that.

6 comments:

Laura said...

Very funny. As a yard sale veteran, the best yard sale stories I have are of all the folks who try to buy the things in my garage that AREN'T for sale (past cases, all of which were unpriced and behind the "sale boundaries": red distressed bookcase; antique vanity; antique bed covered with a dropcloth; hoards of tools and fishing equipment; gardening books on the gardening shelf; Chrismas wreath; even the ceiling fan, which apparently is a rather rare kind and never fails to draw offers). Guess you can't blame them for tryin!

Kim said...

love to shop yard sales...
also love to do yard sales with Laura Leigh...
abhor doing them by myself...
glad you made $100...
will you buy me some shoes?

Ginger said...

Yes,I agree. I love to get rid of crap in my house and really love to make a hundred bucks- hate yard sale people! That is my hesitation everytime I want to have one. Since I carry all my emotions are my face, the stupid ones know it and know I hate them by the time they leave my yard because of the looks I'm sure I give to them. **Note to self- yard sales are probably not a good witnessing tool.

Anonymous said...

whatever, just get rent a dumpster out back and toss the stuff you don't want and the stuff you think someone will buy donate to hannah home! i have not even a tenth percentile of patience to have a yard sale. i'm far too ugly with crazy people.

Missy said...

Thank you for the great laugh!
Seriously, I can't stop!

Kimmipeach@gmail.com said...

My favorite of the yard sale day was the woman from Morocco. She was dressed in western clothes with a headdress. I asked where she was from, how long she's been here. She threw back her shoulders, lifted her head high, and told me that she's been here 34 years. Her daughter was born here and is a citizen. She is also a citizen. I'm pretty sure that she has not been treated well, particularly since 9/11. I was distressed that she has been treated so poorly. We, in the South especially, are such bigots!

Grateful Introspection

Sometimes when a person is expressing gratitude, others call their words a "humble brag". Ty explained this to me. The person is a...