Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Music and Fear

The soundtrack to Twilight is amazing. Muse, Paramore, The Black Ghosts, etc. are so good. I don't listen to the radio so I have no idea if the songs are being overplayed or not. But I'm really hoping that I get the soundtrack for Christmas... hint hint.

I added some of the songs to my playlist and I've listened to it all day. There's a couple of songs that, while watching the movie, I actually said out loud that I liked them. One of the songs sounds so much like Mo Leverett. Same kind of voice and style, Bren thought so too.


--Change of Subject---
I like to give people notice of my changing the subject. I can make some pretty huge leaps and confuse people. Sorry.




I wonder at fear. Not fear of heights or snakes, things like that. But fear of failure. Fear of failure is a curious thing. It is over something that is, most times, never attempted. Maybe no one even knows about it. And yet it feels defining. It feels binding, like our whole way of thinking about ourselves is affected. And most times, it's over something that, to someone else, seems insignificant or maybe obvious.

I can think of several instances where someone I know is afraid to attempt something that everyone around them is sure of. Where I can look at them and almost get angry because they don't believe in themselves. It's so stinkin' obvious that they have the talent or the ability or desire but they just won't jump. I want to get in their head and somehow make them see themselves from my perspective.

I wonder if there is something like this in my own life. I am amazed at the need in me for approval and perfection. I marvel at the way I second guess myself and make second things first. I want to be free from that. I want to be able to attempt things and be able to fail. I want to never find my worth and identity in what I do or even who I am. I want to be free.

6 comments:

Ginger said...

Wow, that was a definite change in subject matter!

And, yes, I thought the same thing about Mo's music sounding like Rob's!

Missy said...

So what am I spectacular at that I am afraid of? Please oh wise one, tell me. As one of your 5, I tell you to move forward. I got yo back!

Anonymous said...

k, i can't wait till we can talk twilight together, lord only knows when that will be. but i have some thoughts thus far...

1st - i find this story incredibly sexy and innocent at the same time. i forget they are teenagers. i'm not sure how i feel about that but it is accurate. i admire bella's restraint when so many times you see dramas on tv where teens act on their hormonal urges. though i know it's not hormones, it's real what she feels for edward. i like reading her perspective, it keeps me awake at night to wonder what he thinks when he sees her. and it makes me blush a little too. so that part of the whole book really revs me up to want more from it.

my second thought...edward. i love LOOOOOVE the way he acts without words, souly on body language and his eyes. i love that outwardly he's perceived as perfection yet we see his weaknesses in his internal actions. it's so honest and awesome and incredibly hot. INCREDIBLY. why do men's weaknesses turn us on. i think i know why. but i'll save that for a face to face conversation and keep my comments pg.

i have lots of other thoughts, those were my main two right there that i had to get out. i'm making my husband crazy talking about it. so there you go.

thanks for helping me become a believer.

Crissy said...

You're very welcome! Insanity loves company...

Amber said...

now if we can just get heather on board tehe....

Anonymous said...

she'll come around. it's gonna come full circle when she reads the book.

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