Friday, June 12, 2009

Need?

What is the difference, or rather, where is the line between need and selfishness? How does one tell which is which?

Some would say that any demand we make on another person is selfishness. Do I really need Chris to help around the house? etc. If I can realistically solve the problem/do the work/fulfill the obligation to ask for help is selfishness.

Others would say that's wrong. God created in us needs and desires. Companionship, understanding, relationship, relaxation, cooperation, etc. We were never meant to be an island. When is it the other person's responsiblity?

I wish I knew. I struggle. How does one express a felt need without it being a demand? How does one not resent the one not meeting the need? Or, for that matter, even seeing the struggle?

And while I am so wrapped up in my own needs/selfishness, what is happening in the world around me? How many people around me feel the same way? About me? Ouch.

2 comments:

heather said...

I have this same thought too. But I always can add another twist. I fell like if I don't demand Darrin should notice and then praise me. I never thought of myself as selfish until lately but really I am so selfish.

Anonymous said...

i'm selfish. i deal. it sucks. but it is what it is. sometimes it consumes me with guilt so bad that i just want to ball up and cry. but then i think i can't live that way either. so in a sense it's a journey.

i hate relying on others notice of me in order to fullfill my own self righteous thoughts i have about myself. which begs the other question...what do i really think of myself.

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