There are a million checklists on the internet for Moms to Be and even Dads to Be. What Your Nursery Needs, What You Need to Know About Delivery, even Baby Essentials.
But what about grandmothers? Where are our lists? They are very few and far between. Actually, they might not exist. I surely can't find one. This isn't a tragedy because as a soon-to-be-grandma, we are well adapted to figuring things out on the fly. I mean, we've raised children.
We've had all manner of insanity tossed at us for decades - broken down cars, sick babies, potty training, last minute science projects, puberty meltdowns. When presented with chaos, we are like Marines: we adapt and overcome.
Still, if you are about to become a grandmother for the first time, a little help would be appreciated.
Going to the hospital for the birth of a grandbaby is exhilarating and nerve wracking. It's also complicated. Are you the paternal or maternal grandmother? It will be different for each. What to expect?
As the paternal grandmother, barring that your daughter-in-law is on her own, there is much less to do. Your hospital bag will more than likely get you thru hours in the waiting room.
As the maternal grandmother, chances are you will be in the delivery room. Your role is delicate. You are there to SUPPORT, not take over. Your son-in-law, for the first delivery anyway, might be overwhelmed and scared. Encourage him, make quiet suggestions, offer ideas, but read the room. If you see they need some alone time, take a break and hang out with the other grandmother in the waiting room.
What to Pack:
- Warm Socks
- Slippers or slip-on shoes
- Comfy Change of Clothes
- Sweater or Sweatshirt
- Compression Socks (these will keep your feet from getting sore from standing or swelling from sitting)
- Earbuds (slipping this in your ears gives the parents-to-be privacy)
- Chargers for all electronics
- Small Blanket
- Travel Pillow
- Eye Mask
- Travel Makeup and Remover Wipes
- Deodorant
- Comb/Brush
- Toothbrush/Toothpaste/Mouthwash
- Lip balm (for yourself and mom-to-be)
- Prescription/OTC Medications (set an alarm to remember to take it)
- Cough Drops/Gum
- Book or Magazine
- Change for Vending Machines
- Snacks that don't have a strong odor (your mother-to-be cannot eat during labor so don't torture her!) Think trail mix, grapes, an apple, crackers, Belvita bars, etc.
- Lotion, hand sanitizer
- Small mirror for mom-to-be to use after delivery and before visitors
- List of people you are supposed to keep in the loop. Don't assume you'll remember; things get exciting and you might forget someone.
If you're the one who's allowed in the delivery room, make sure to keep the other grandmother informed. Text her, go sit with her some. She's a part of this too!
Other things to remember:
- Try to stay rested in the days leading up to the due date. You will be needed!
- As the day approaches, organize a group of your friends to help you clean the mom-to-be's house. Laundry, floors, scrub toilets, cook casseroles for the freezer.
- Ask your child what they need from you. Don't assume. Be humble. This is their little family now; they make the rules.
- If your child has children already, spend the days leading up to delivery keeping your toddler entertained. Mom-to-be is probably exhausted.
- Encourage the happy couple to take birthing classes. They are invaluable!
As I edit this post one last time before publishing, my son called to tell me my fifth grandbaby might be making an appearance tonight! Glad I have my list!
